My quarter-life crisis taught me it’s not about money like society tells you
The biggest lesson I learned from my quarter-life crisis is I need a job with a purpose. You could also say I had a purpose crisis.
I thought I did everything to achieve success: getting good money for my job. But when you finally achieve what society told you to do, you will see that it’s not what you wanted.
I had the money, but it’s not the only form of wealth.
Robin Sharma writes about the 8 forms of wealth in his latest book, “Wealth Money Can’t Buy” and I 100% agree with all of them.
In the last generations, it was important to get a well-paying job to support the family. But now I would never be happy with a useless job.
We don’t need to think about putting food on the table anymore, but now we have improved our lives to think about our passion.
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs
Did you learn about Maslow’s hierarchy of needs at school?
I think his observation of human needs is why our generation is looking for self-actualization instead of the best-paying job.
In the 21st century, we are lucky to say that our basic needs like food, water, rest, and security are met. We never had a time in our lives when we didn’t get food.
In developed countries, the percentage of undernourished people decreased from 35% in 1970 to 13% in 2015. (Source: Our World in Data Website)
What do I want to make clear with these statistics?
Our basic needs are met.
It’s not about just finding a job anymore, we have improved our lifestyle so much that we can think about satisfying other needs like a feeling of accomplishment or self-fulfillment.
You have the possibility of finding happiness in your job instead of thinking about money and food all the time.
Lifelong growth
You don’t have to worry about food and money anymore. You can now focus on your growth: to improve yourself physically and mentally every day.
Without growth, you are plateauing, which means you are decreasing.
It sounds exhausting to improve yourself your whole life, but without a challenge, you will get bored and not be happy.
Did you ever work at a job where you did the same thing every day?
Be aware, because it will get replaced by AI or robots soon. A machine can do a better job because we are losing focus and energy during repetitive tasks.
Our brain needs challenges and opportunities to grow. And that’s part of our happiness and success.
Being wealthy and successful isn’t achieved one day by reaching the top, and then you are staying there forever. If you stay there, don’t challenge yourself anymore, and are not reaching for more, you will eventually get bored and unhappy again.
That’s human.
We are always reaching for more growth and new opportunities. If we stagnate, we will get unhappy.
Your craft
One form of wealth Robin Sharma writes about in his recent book is craft. Doing something you are passionate about. It doesn’t have to be your job or creative.
Something you like to do. And also something you want to get better at.
What can you do to find success and happiness in your craft?
Master your passion
Try becoming the best at what you do.
- Improve your skills
- Combine it with new opportunities
- Learn everything there is to learn
Meaningful work
Find a purpose behind your work. If you are stuck in a job you think is meaningless, you will not be happy with it.
Sometimes it only takes a shift in perspective.
- Who are you helping with your work?
- What do others think of your job?
- Is there someone who likes your job, and why?
Or sometimes you just need to switch to a different company to find a better environment.
Commit to doing it as skillfully as you can
Sometimes we don’t like our jobs because we are just mediocre at what we do. Change your perspective and commit to improving your skills.
By getting better at something, we will also like it more.
If you start playing tennis, you will probably not like it at first because you don’t hit the ball, and it takes a lot of training.
But if you work on your skills, you will improve fast and will be able to have a match with a friend, and that’s fun.
Contribute to your community
A lot of people find their purpose in community work. Contributing to an environment you love with friends you like to hang out with can greatly improve your happiness.
Check out local organizations if they need volunteers!
I’ve found a great community at my student organization. We volunteer to help students get an internship abroad. It’s about improving cultural exchange and exploring the world.
It’s definitely part of my happiness.
Read books
There are so many books about everything. If you want to improve your craft, check out the nearest library or buy some books.
There are so many inspiring stories and well-written books out there. You can learn a lot.
Go to events
Last but not least, one of the best things I found was to go to events and listen to new ideas, stories, and people.
I get so much inspiration from that, and it helps me combine new ideas and stories.
You will find a conference or evening talk in every city on every topic.
The bonus is that you will also find like-minded people, and you won’t feel so alone anymore.
Conclusion
The most important lesson I learned from my quarter-life crisis is to not listen to society. Their view of success doesn’t need to be yours.
This is your life, and you can choose what success and wealth mean to you.
Money is not the enemy here, but it’s only one part of wealth.
Before you go ahead into your busy life or read more, take a moment and answer this question:
What does success mean to you?
If you struggle to answer it, visualize your perfect day. Without thinking about society and other people.
Just for you.
“Don’t spend the best days of your life climbing a mountain only to realize when it’s too late that you’ve climbed the wrong one. Wasting a life is a tragic mistake”
— Robin Sharma
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